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Hey there, Dorothy -- are you a Good Witch or a Bad Witch? Is your friend acting like a bitch? Answer these five questions from Samantha's Twisted Book of Shadows and find out which witch is which?
1. These days I ride:
a) side-saddle
b) a broom
c) a vibrator
d) a vacuum cleaner
e) the bus home alone
2. My familiar is:
a) a dog named Toto
b) a flying monkey I conjured up the other day in my cauldron
c) Sailor Moon
d) several black cats
e) a gay friend
3. My idea of a good time is:
a) baking cupcakes for the poor
b) stealing food and reselling it outside the food bank
c) dressing up like Vampira and going to fetish night
d) doing impressions of Margaret Hamilton to amuse my friends
e) being alone so nobody hurts my feelings.
4. My favorite television witch is:
a) Martha Stewart
b) Endora from Bewitched
c) Sabrina the Teenage Witch
d) Heather Locklear
e) Kathie Lee Gifford.
5. My favorite witch movie is:
a) Practical Magic
b) The Craft
c) Rosemary's Baby
d) Mommie Dearest
e) The Wizard of Oz.
Now analyze your answers below to find out what kind of witch you are!!
A) GLINDA THE GOOD WITCH
If your answers were all "a", you are a modern Glinda the Good Witch. You visualize all your troubles surrounded in a bubble and floating away from
you, and it works. Congratulations.
1. You're probably a real tree-hugger and into horses and nature and all
that.
2. You're just like Dorothy, who, if you'll recall, was Glinda the Good Witch's protégée in The Wizard of Oz.
3. You know that all the goodness that you do comes back to you three by three by three.
4. You love the way Martha Stewart says, "It's a good thing" at the end of every segment.
5. You love the idea of a bunch of modern witches mixing up potions from their
kitchen cupboards, wearing headscarves and dancing to music by Stevie Nicks.
B) A WICKED WITCH
If your answers were all "b", you are just plain eeevil.
1. If you get on a broom and your feet actually lift off the ground, that is truly creepy.
2. A monkey with wings is a dead giveaway.
3. To steal from the poor is pretty unspeakably evil.
4. Endora's a wicked old crone just like you -- only a little prettier.
5. You kind of like that Fairuza kid... you wish you had a daughter just like her.
C) YOU'RE A WITCH WANNABE
If your answers are all "c", you're just a wannabe. You've bought one of those
do-it-yourself witchcraft books at the local new-age store, and even though
you've been following the recipes, havoc is still being wreaked in your
life. Do you think that if a spell actually worked, a real witch would
really give her secrets of success away in a book that could be had for 10
bucks? Think about it.
1. If all those love spells you do actually worked, you wouldn't need to be using a vibrator.
2. Dressing like Sailor Moon won't give you supernatural powers.
3. Dressing in a way that appeals to men empowers men, not you... think again.
4. Statistics in The Toronto Sun recently cited that witchcraft is the No. 1 interest of teenage girls, so if you're a wannabe, chances are that this is your favorite show.
5. So far you've been practicing witchcraft all by yourself. Wouldn't it be nice to belong to a real coven like Rosemary's friends?
D) SURPRISE... YOU'RE NOT A WITCH BUT A GAY MAN!
If your answers are all "d", you're gay! I know it's confusing, but it's true. Gay males love a good wicked female archetype more than life itself.
1. You like to clean; that means you're gay!
2. Cats are considered to be "gay children".
3. You also like to do the occasional impression of Joan Crawford.
4. She's a Goddess in the Office! You wanna be Evil Scheming Manipulative Heather Locklear!
5. You love the scene where Joan beats little Christina with the hanger.
E) YOU'RE A WITCH'S VICTIM
If your answers are all "e", the only kind of spell you know is a fainting spell. You're more the kind of person prone to be the victim of witches because you refuse to acknowledge that magic exists. You wouldn't know what an athame was if you were lying on a slab and it was plunged into your heart (not that there's anything wrong with that).
1. Witches have cast spells so they get all the men and all the rides home.
2. All the straight males have been bewitched by real witches, so you're stuck with this gay friend.
3. You are the victim of the many psychic attacks practiced by amateur witchlets out there.
4. You don't really like Kathie Lee Gifford but for some reason every time she's on the TV you just can't stop watching her... it's like you're under her spell or something.
6. The Wizard of Oz is the only movie you've seen with a real witch in it.
* Editorial Note: This is our beloved Samantha exercising her funny bone; athames are never meant to touch blood and are not used in any form of
sacrifice. No Victims were harmed or sacrificed in the writing of this article. J (David)
Samantha Steven's articles have been published in many high-standing newspapers and she has published several books. If you wish to buy Samantha's books about metaphysics click here http://www.insomniacpress.com/author.php?id=110 You can meet Samantha Stevens at http://www.psychicrealm.com where she works as a professional psychic. You can also read more of her articles at http://www.newagenotebook.com
The New Season of Dancing with the Stars
It didn't matter what season it was, the whole show - dancing, judges and contestants, had grown tiresome. Chloris Leachman frustrated me to such a degree I even stopped watching. But then along came Gilles Marini, Lil Kim, Ty Murray, Melissa Rycroft, The Woz, Julianne's boyfriend, Chuck Wicks, Denise Richards, Shawn Johnson, and a few others that really didn't interest me.
But not all was lost - someone did hold my attention. I couldn't wait to see the outstanding dancing of Frenchman Gilles Marini. After watching the Sex and the City movie, he really spiked my interest. He did not disappoint in Dancing with the Stars! Most of his dances ramp up the heat in the ballroom. Carrie Ann Inaba even mentioned how lucky his wife was.
Just like her short lived show on E! Network, Denise Richards proved to be equally dull and talentless on Dancing with the Stars The Woz had the personality, but no talent. Chuck Wicks wins an A for effort with he tremendous work he put into his dancing which kept him around until near the end. I didn't really like Lil' Kim until I saw her dance so amazingly well. Derek Huff did wonders with his choreography and inspiration. They obviously had real chemistry, and they demonstrated a high level of talent and skill as well. It was a shock that she was eliminated with four others remaining.
As it stands right now the last couples in competition are Melissa and Tony, Ty and Chelsie, Gilles and Cheryl, Shawn and Mark. Melissa came in shortly before the show when Jewel was injured. You could tell right off the bat that she has been trained in ballet dancing so it wasn't too hard for her to get up to speed quickly. Her performances have been close to perfection, earning her perfect scores in the last show. Perfect scores do not protect you from being voted off, however. Just like Sabrina Bryan. She received a perfect score in another season and was eliminated early. Ty Murry is the dancer who has so improved, and is also so love-able. Ty's experience riding bulls and guiding horses doesn't translate directly to the dance floor and provided a big cache of voting fans who normally wouldn't watch Dancing with the Stars. Shawn Johnson's Olympic performance was so endearing, and her dancing is the same. And rounding this amazing cast of celebrities is Gilles Marini who didn't make a move I didn't absolutely love.
Just which couple has the chops and the votes to win the judge's hearts? An additional couple returns home this week. After that the three last dance teams have a final dance-off. I can't wait until the final show airs! Luckily I have a DVR for a backup just in case something comes up.
On a side note, one of the best ways to watch Dancing with the Stars is in high definition. After fifteen years with my regular 32-inch screen I decided to take the leap and make the HDTV upgrade with a new widescreen TV. Holy Cow! HD really gives you that 'you're really there' feeling. I had no idea how good it was. All I had to do once I got my new HD TV was contact Comcast Cable, my local provider, and add HD channels to my already low priced service. By taking advantage of a bundle special for my area I was able to add Comcast High Speed Internet and Comcast Digital Voice. My download speeds and television picture are by far the fastest and clearest I have ever experienced with my new broadband service and HD Comcast Cable. As a bonus, they offer digital phone service at flat rate pricing. The phone is very clear and I can call friends and family around the US and never have to pay long distance charges. You do not have to think twice before order Comcast's great package deals. Saving money while enjoying the best cable tv, broadband internet, and digital phone service can offer is a no-brainer. I suggest using the web to find the best Comcast Cable promotions and savings out there. You really can save a bunch if you know where to find them. Consider Comcast's bundle called Triple Play. You can get each service in one discounted package for huge savings over purchasing each one individually.
About the Author
S.McMahon covers the latest Comcast Cable HD TV Digital Services for interested consumers. She finds The Best Comcast Cable TV Deals Available Online; so make sure to check her reviews about Digital Comcast Cable TV, Comcast Phone and Comcast High Speed Internet Service.
i want a new digital camara - which one shall i buy - thinking Canon EOS 400d????????
but not sure as lots of people saying lens kit (18-55) not so good and that fugi is better as the pixels are better technology - help - must buy eos before end of month so i can get £50 cashback making it a wicked £399 - shall i just buy it or is there something better!!!!!!!!!
The best camera for anyone to buy is the one that fits the user's needs.
A lot of people spend a lot of money for a camera with features they will never use. You can waste big money for megapixels that are wasted on 4x6 prints, or even sharing on the internet.
On the other hand, some people are disappointed in the camera they bought because it doesn't do what they expected. Perhaps, they didn't spend enough.
You have to list the functions you want a camera to have, and then shop around for the one that has those features. Do you intend to take a lot of action shots? You will need a high shutter speed. Do you expect to take photos from a great distance from your subjects? You will need one with a good telephoto capability. In other words, good optical zoom and disregard any digital zoom numbers. Close up photography of flowers and bugs? You will need to find one with macro capabilities. Do you want simplicity and ease of use? Or do you want more control? Do you expect to carry the camera around in your pocket or purse? If so, don't expect a lot of sophisticated features. Do you intend to print large copies, such as 8x10 or larger? Then you want 5 megapixels or more.
All these, and other questions need to be answered before you worry about the price, or, even the model of your camera. Do the research. Read the professional AND the user reviews. Compare features. Decide on the functions you MUST have, then, if budget is a factor, decide on which compromises you can live with. Narrow down your search to the two or three models you like, THEN shop around for the best price.
Don't get sucked in by sales hype, or schoolyard gossip about which camera is the "coolest." If you are going to spend hundreds, don't get stuck with something that will disappoint you.
University of Ottawa and IBM Create New Analytics Research Center
OTTAWA, April 15 /PRNewswire-FirstCall/ -- IBM (NYSE: IBM) and the Telfer School of Management at the University of Ottawa today announced they are collaborating to create an international center of excellence for business analytics at the University's Telfer School to help prepare students for careers in "economy of tomorrow" industries that are expected to benefit from the billions in ...
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